Part 14: The Plan

This week it was finally time to go see Banana and after spending some time in my super awesome command station, I was finally able to get some time alone with Doo Dog. We discussed the shiny spring that seemed to have an inexplicable power to draw me to itself and he concurred with my suspicion that it was definitely some sort of evil device placed by Ellie and Squirt. This was the last straw. Not only had they sent a bug into my domain but now they were placing devices that could influence my superhero mind and distract me from the task at hand. They must be stopped! So I began to formulate my plan… instead of waiting for them to come to me, it is now time for me to go to them. I will descend in all my super strength on their secret liar of evil! But how? I discussed all the possibilities with Doo Dog and we finally concluded that I would have to sneak out the portal. I hated to be slight of hand, but I felt it was absolutely necessary if I was ever going to truly ensure the safety of Mom, Dad and Uncle Schmoe. A superhero must do what a superhero must do and as soon as I arrive home I will begin looking for my opportunity to take action.

 

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Part 13: The Enchanted Doorstop ©

Today the strangest thing happened.  I was on the floor coating some objects with my super spit, just to make sure they didn’t have any bugs on them, when suddenly I was distracted by a shiny spring sticking out next to the doorway.  I wanted to continue my spit coating but for some reason I felt that I must go and chew on this shiny object.  It was so strange; I just couldn’t resist the draw.  Dad even kept picking me up and turning me in a different direction but I kept feeling as though I must turn back. Finally he gave up and moved me to a different room. As soon as he did, the urge went away and I was back to my normal self.  It was then that I realized it must be some sort of spell cast by Ellie and Squirt, which meant that I would have to investigate the matter further. Perhaps my friends at Banana’s house would know… I will most definitely ask Doo Dog on my next visit.

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Part 12: Super Strength! ©

Since my conversation with Mr. Tiggles I have been very diligent in improving my superhero skills.  In fact, it was just yesterday that I discovered a new power while Mom and I were building small cities with colorful pieces of wood.  Mom was neatly stacking the wood to make towers, which I find to be completely unimaginative, so I tried to tell her that we should be more creative. As usual, she didn’t seem to understand.  I moved closer to her tower and reached out to show her my ideas but instead of grasping the piece of wood, I demolished the entire tower with one stroke of my hand.  This was phenomenal!  I actually have super strength that can flatten an entire wooden structure with one blow! Mom was also very impressed because she clapped her hands and laughed with joy at my new development… she can be so supportive sometimes.  Anyways, once we made this discovery she began to make more towers while I continued to practice knocking them down and I have to say it was quite exhilarating.  This new-found super power is sure to be quite useful in defeating my enemies and I am quite anxious to tell Puff Bunny about it before I pass out later this evening… He is always very impressed with all of my superhero stories and I am sure this will be a favorite.

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Part 11: The Plot ©

Today I made a breakthrough! I met with Mr. Tiggles at our usual spot by the window and he provided me with information regarding the reason for Ellie and Squirt’s plot to infiltrate my domain.  Being the clever spy that he is, Mr. Tiggles dug a tunnel that comes up under a patch of grass right behind the enemy’s base of operations.  During one of his stake outs in the tunnel, Mr. Tiggles told me that he overheard the creatures alking secretly among themselves and it seems they actually used to dwell on MY side of the portal with Mom and Dad.  But what Mr. Tiggles also found out was that when my transport device landed, Ellie and Squirt were forever banished to the outside, which must be what they meant by saying they would reclaim what was once theirs. It all made sense now… I realized all at once that I had actually saved Mom and Dad from enemy occupation and that is why these villainous creatures were now out for revenge.  Suddenly I knew that it was up to me to stop their diabolical plan and I must  be even more diligent to keep my super powers in top condition. Also I must continue to gather intelligence on their plots so that when the time comes, I will be able to defeat them once and for all.

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Part 10: The Padded Cell ©

I think now is a good time to talk about another mystery that has been the subject of my contemplations for as long as I can remember. Every vening, and at least twice a day, I am placed in a padded cell.  It is made of wood but has pads all around the bars and it is guarded by four creatures that dangle above me… There is a pig named Widget, the duck is Quack, there is a frog named Flip and a rabbit who calls himself Blue ecause of his blue jacket.  They taunt me relentlessly but fortunately I have a cell mate called Puff Bunny who is also a rabbit. He is a timid little
thing but we are very close friends and we talk about absolutely everything even if it’s the middle of the night. Recently we have been discussing the possible reasons that I am placed here on such a regular basis and so far the only reasonable explanation we can fathom is that it is some form of superhero training to sharpen my escape skills.  The only problem with me escaping is that it seems there is some sort of sleep agent being used in my cell.  No matter how much I protest, when I am placed inside, it is only a matter of time before I suddenly become unconscious and I don’t wake up until several hours later… so first I must build up immunity to this sleep agent and then I will be able to work on the art of escape.  Fortunately Puff has already developed immunity and he watches out for me when I can no longer resist the pull of unconsciousness… which I am feeling right now as I speak… fading fast… but never fear… I shall return!

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Part 9: Baby No and The Mysterious Spoon ©

In addition to my super serum I am fed variety of mushy substances with a device that I have been investigating for months now.  Mom says the device is a “spoon”; Dad seems to believe it is some sort of shovel and Uncle Schmoe, of course, thinks it’s a radio antenna to contact his friends in outer space, which doesn’t make any sense to me.  Personally, I find the device absolutely fascinating and it is my belief that it can be used to capture bugs and deliver them to Mr. Tiggles; so this week I determined to confiscate it.  Yesterday morning Mom put me in my usual feeding mechanism and as was expected, brought the device along with a container of green mush.  She opened the container and began to feed me scoops of the green substance, which I might say was absolutely repulsive. After about four or five servings I decided it was definitely time to retrieve the device. As soon as it came close to my mouth I reached up and grasped the handle with my super strong grip.  Mom didn’t seem to understand that I needed to have it because she kept trying to take it away from me, but it wasn’t long before I over powered her. Once she was forced to let go, green mush went flying and landed directly onto her shirt.  Mom, surprised by my victory, could only say “Oh, No!” and then went to the water spout to wash off the substance while I gloried in my triumph!  However, my victory was short lived because when she came back she somehow weakened my super grip and took back the device.  I was incredibly displeased.  I tried to explain that I needed it for capturing bugs but she would not listen and once again I had no choice but to release a torrent of tears over my loss.  I’m not sure if she nderstood my pain but I at least did my very best to communicate it to her… I suppose for now I will just have to think of some other method for delivering bugs to Mr. Tiggles.

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Part 8: Meet Mr. Tiggles ©

Mr. Tiggles is a frog who lives outside of my window where I frequently sit to contemplate life.  We have become friends over the past several weeks and it turns out that he is actually a spy who keeps tabs on everything that happens in the outside world. He tells me the most amazing stories! However,  this week I decided to enlist his help in gathering information about Ellie and Squirt.  I explained to him that they had threatened to take over my domain and claimed it had somehow belonged to them before it belonged to me.  Of course neither Mr. Tiggles nor I had any idea what they could be talking about but we agreed that we must find out and put an end to their sinister plot.  He was very eager to accept the task because as it so happens, he has had several run-ins with the evil creatures himself… Mr. Tiggles says that anytime he is even close to their dwelling place, they try to capture and torture him for information about something called a “Cat” that apparently roams the streets outside. Anyways, the important thing is that we are now partners and in exchange for his services I have agreed to give him any bugs that I find… Apparently he likes to take of them personally.

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Part 7: Banana, Captain Pops and the Fluffy White Creatures ©

This week I visited the domain of Banana and Captain Pops.  I can never tell if Mom is saying “My Nana” or “Banana” so I just call her Banana… she’s pretty cool and also provides me with an excellent command station that allows me to develop all of my super senses.  Captain Pops lives with Banana and he is my flight instructor who takes me flying all over their domain on a regular basis.  You see, since Mom and Dad seem to be opposed to me practicing flying at home I have decided to obtain instruction on the subject and perhaps I will eventually perfect my skills enough to practice without interruption. Anyways… also living with Banana and Captain Pops are four fluffy white creatures very similar to the creatures that live outside the portal at my home domain.  However, I have come to discover that these particular creatures are actually friendly and are in fact excellent sources of information.  Their names are Doo Dog (who speaks fluent Gibberish), Sweetness, Chubby and DumbDumb.  The last one has questionable allegiance so I generally conduct all of my fact-finding conversations with the first three and this week I actually found out something rather useful.  Doo Dog informed me that if I wish to effectively neutralize a confrontation with Ellie and Squirt then I should make a sound with my throat called a “growl”.  I had never before heard of such a thing so I asked Chubby to demonstrate and I was amazed at the fierceness of the sound!!! I then decided to try it for myself and even though I still needed practice, Doo Dog said it was quite exceptional for my first try.  Since then I have been practicing my growl diligently in order to be ready for any future confrontations… I even tried it on Banana and she seemed to think I was quite intimidating although afterwards she kept kissing my cheeks like she thought I was being cute or something… Oh well, I will just keep practicing.

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Part 6: Baby No vs. The Bug ©

Today started out as an average day… Mom fed me my super serum, removed the stink bomb from my posterior which is another one of my many powers and then put me on the floor for me to do my exercises while she read something called a book.  It was about then that I saw a small black object moving across the floor so I moved a little closer to investigate.  It had six little legs and a round sort of body with squiggly things coming out of its head, which was very odd looking but I didn’t think it would be polite to say anything about it.  After observing it for a few minutes I decided I should ask its name but before I could get the words out, Mom looked up and shouted “BUG!!” It was a bug! Fortunately Stinky Pants from the Nursery had told me that these bugs were in league with my enemies and I knew exactly what to do… Mom had begun searching for a suitable weapon, but I was already in action.  I boldly approached the bug and said “Tell me all you know about the creatures outside or die!”  “I’ll never tell you anything!” he shouted back.  I had no choice then but to dispatch of him so I covered him in super spit and  pened my mouth wide… Mom had found a weapon and was rushing over chanting my name “No, No, NO!” but I had already taken care of the situation and swallowed the evil creature.   I knew I was her hero because she scooped me up in her arms and began patting me on the back.  I tried to tell her it was all in a day’s work but I guess she was just too grateful.

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Part 5: Happy Pappy and The Grand Ma ©

I think now is a good time to introduce you to two more of the interesting people who frequent my superhero life.  There is this old lady that calls herself simply The Grand Ma and a fuzzy old man that usually travels with her and, according to Uncle Schmoe, his name is Happy Pappy.  They come to my domain and visit me frequently which is always great fun because I am quite sure that the Grand Ma actually speaks a small amount of Gibberish. I’ve told her all my conspiracies regarding the creatures outside the portal and I am confident that she is in total agreement. Also, both the Grand Ma and Happy Pappy wear these round, wire looking devices over their eyes which I am absolutely sure allows them to have some kind of x-ray vision. Such a device would be a phenomenal weapon against my enemies! I feel it is absolutely necessary for me to obtain them as part of my spy gear collection. So today I politely asked them to hand them to me but they didn’t seem to understand… like I said the Grand Ma only speaks a small amount of my secret dialect and I have received no indication as to whether Happy Pappy speaks any at all. Nevertheless, I simply must have the devices, so whenever they are holding me I begin to slowly remove them from their faces.  Unfortunately my stealth skills are not completely developed and they always seem to catch me and take them back.  I try to tell them that I only want to keep them long enough to duplicate the design at my secret lab but once again, I think they are misunderstanding.  Oh well, I suppose I will just keep trying.

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